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The noblest of dogs is the hot dog, it feeds the hand that bites it.

Chuck Norris died 20 years ago, Death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.

Creative Snowman

Large man on motorbike.

Diving Fail.

Chuck Norris doesn't flush the toilet, he scares the sh*t out of it.

... It's not a clown car!

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[PIC] Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering - and it's all over much too soon. - Woody Allen

[PIC] Can you spot the dog?

Confucius Say: It's ok to let a fool kiss you, but don't let a kiss fool you.

[PIC] Chuck Norris can strangle you with a cordless telephone.

Confucius Say: Masturbation is a solo played on a private organ.

I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.

Confucius Say: Man with five dicks will have pants that fit like a glove.

Have you ever noticed? Anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone driving faster than you is a maniac!

Confucius Say: A Shotgun wedding is a case of wife or death.

The pen is mightier than the sword, and considerably easier to write with.

[PIC] Like a boss.

Confucius Say: Mother's Day comes nine months after father's day.